Political Dating MisadventuresPosted by Ross
So I’ve noticed ads for a dating site that’s specifically for liberals. I would assume, then, that there is also a dating site specifically for conservatives. It makes me wonder if the same company is running both. If it were, I could imagine mix-ups happening from time-to-time.
Our guy, the liberal (we’ll call him George), meets our eligible lady (we’ll call her Georgina), who happens to be conservative, at a Starbucks.
George: Hello there.
Georgina: Hello there, good to meet you.
George: Same here. It sure is great to meet someone who believes in the same exact political things I believe in. And you’re not bad looking to boot!
Georgina: Agreed. Do you want to get some coffee?
George: Oh yes, I’ve been looking forward to a grande triple chai mocacinno with whipped cream all day.
Georgina: You like the grande triple chai mocacinno with whipped cream?
George: I do.
Georgina: That’s my favorite drink. We have so much in common!
George: That’s why I only go out on dates with people who share the exact same political beliefs as myself. Speaking of which, did you hear the news today?
Georgina: About the president?
George: Yes, can you believe it?
Georgina: I know! Those people make me sick.
George: Me too! I’m so glad you agree with me on this.
Georgina: How could I not?
George: And can you believe what’s happening with the abortion issue?
Georgina: No, I can not. It’s the most stomach-churning, deplorable think in the whole wide world. And what about the gay marriage issue, can you believe what those people
George: It’s unbelievable what THOSE PEOPLE are doing. Have they no decency?
Georgina: Exactly. I’m so glad we agree on these things.
George: I agree. Making people wrong for their personal political beliefs helps me forget about my own crippling pain and depression!
Georgina: It’s THEIR FAULT that you’re depressed in the first place!
George: Exactly! I think I love you.
Georgina: I love you too. Let’s get married this very night so we can have sex without making the baby Jesus weep tears of pure acid!
George: Hahahahahaha! You’re funny.
Georgina: But… I wasn’t joking.